A Day in the Life

(of an unemployed 20-something):
-10:00 AM: The alarm goes off (for the first time). Stupid, stupid alarm! Don't you know I was up until 2:30 AM alternating between watching old Sex and the City episodes and old Stargate SG-1 episodes (This is what happens when you live with your boyfriend. You have to compromise, people.)? I know it's the super-annoying alarm that we recorded ourselves on Chris's phone, designed specifically to get our asses out of bed, but I'm drowsy and have nowhere to be (The alarm consists of Chris playing the most horrible guitar chord he could think of while I scream "WAKE UP!" until my throat hurts so much that I cough into the phone).
-10:15 AM: "Bah bah WAKE UP! bah bah bah WAKE UP! Bah BAH BAH HUWAH HUWAH (that's coughing)"
-10:30 AM: "Chris, we really should get up." "Nooooooooooooooo." "Ok, you're the boss." Zzzzzzzzzzzz...
-11:00 AM: Get up, pee, brush teeth, but stay in pajamas. Go downstairs to feed the poor bunny who's been ready for breakfast since 6:00 AM.
-11:05 AM: COFFEE COFFEE COFFEE. Have I mentioned that I make really good coffee? You have to put one heaping tablespoon of coffee per cup and then add a little extra. Then, put your milk and/or sugar in the mug first. If you do milk, microwave it before putting the coffee into the mug. That way, your coffee won't get cold after like, point-zero-six seconds. Kind of like a Cafe Au Lait, I suppose. Anyways, YUM non-work-poison-coffee.
-11:15 AM: Breakfast, which I so affectionately made, is ready. Being unemployed= eating nice, big breakfasts every morning. Now that's the way to start your day kids.
-12:00 PM: Scour craigslist, local newspapers, online jobs boards, etc for job possibilities. Send fifteen inquiries, 14 of which turn out to be scams. No, I will not put my SSN into an online form, thank yew very much. You only get that number outta me if you hire me and give me moneys.
-1:00 PM: Glance through resume again. There must be some reason why no one has hired me yet. Shit, I totally forgot! I'm a notary public! That shit's marketable, yo! Put that shizzy on that page, bitch! In Mutha Fuckin' BOLD.
-1:30 PM: That phone interview for that job I really want. This is the third interview with the same company. That must mean they want me. No other reason to interview me THREE times.
-2:30 PM: Sit on the floor and pet Coltrane. The bun LOVES unemployed mommy. It means more treats, more roaming around the apartment, and more face-time. What bun doesn't know, is that unemployed mommy could eventually mean NO FOOD.
-3:00 PM: Chris goes to work, which means the TV is MINE. MINE! Sex and the City, perhaps a second cup of coffee, and job-searching on my little netbook. Maybe they've updated the classifieds sometime in the last hour?
-5:00 PM: Workout. Do it. Come on, don't be a wussy with a "p." Get your ass moving girl! (That's my pep talk to myself, btw).
-6:00 PM: SHOWER. Even unemployed people need to do this on occasion.
-6:30 PM: Receive an email about that job with the three interviews. They want someone with a different kind of experience. Cry. A Lot.
-7:00 PM: Go to therapy. Cry. A Lot. Some more.
-8:00 PM: Home. I have time on my hands, which means I can take the time to cook a nice meal for Chris and I. It'll be hot on the plate at exactly the time he walks in the door. I'm Little Miss Domestic, and it's a pleasure to meet you.
-8:30 PM: Both parties, while ravenously eating, begin jockeying for control of the remote. Which person gets to choose what goes on the TV? Girly Sexy Smart or Nerdy Dorky Irritating? To me, the choice is obvious.
-9:00 PM: Whelp, Chris got the TV. I should do some writing. Maybe I'll write a blog post. Maybe I'll work on the book. Maybe I'll do another article for that company that runs a Writer-Sweat-Shop and pays $2.10 per article.
-11:00 PM: The alernating TV watching begins. Somewhere around 12 or 1 comes a snack, often Pita Chips.
-2:00 AM: I'm not really tired, but I should go to bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll get an interview....


SIGH. HIRE ME.

Epic Fail/ Happy Thanksgiving

Whelp folks, there is no way I'm going to be able to finish my NaNoWriMo novel this month. I have failed you all. Please don't judge me. Or, if you do, just don't tell me you are judging me. Life has been insane with trying to find a job (scary!), recording an album, and traveling for Thanksgiving, and somehow the novel-writing did not make priority. However, I plan on finishing my 50,000 words, hopefully by the end of December. I will let you guys know when I finish (if you're interested). The perfectionist in me does not like not finishing (double negative, I know!), but I think I owe it to myself to focus on the job search, enjoy the holidays, and to write in a fun, leisurely manner.

So that's that.

As for Thanksgiving, I traveled back home and spent time at my dad's house and then at my mom's house. T'was lovely.

So here is my list of things I'm thankful for:

1. Non-judgmental blog-readers (that's you!).
2. A wonderful family (which is HUGE-mongous and crazy and absurd and awesome).
4. A wonderful boyfriend who loves me and who has finally finished making our workbench (ten points for him).
3. Healthy, sweet-cute bunnies (Coltrane had a health episode right before I left for home for Thanksgiving, which was quite worrisome. But, he's doing great now, so whew!).
5. Avocados.

I hope you all had wonderful holidays. I ate so much I literally couldn't move for 4 hours.

Studio Magic

So, this past weekend I was in the recording studio for 16+ hours. My band is making its debut album (woo!), so all six of us spent many hours recording rhythm tracks for 12 of our original songs. And the spare time I had between sessions I spent making lead sheets (essentially maps) for each of our songs so we would be as productive as possible (Am I a first born? Yes. Perfectionist? Yes. Control freak? Yes.). As a result, zero writing has occurred. I've also tried to find a job. Because I am now unemployed, meaning zero money is coming in. Meaning no spending! Meaning, eat what is in the house, damnit. No sushi for you.

Anyways, being in the studio felt incredibly glamorous, I ain't gonna lie. I alternated between mainlining beer and coffee, resulting in dehydration. Several amusing "inside" jokes arose, including sending for "strippers, cocaine, and hand warmers." Also, when I told Chris his guitar (which I was then playing) wouldn't stay in tune, he said something to the effect of "now you know I feel." (PS- Have I mentioned that Chris and I are both in the same band?) The sound engineer promptly called for a guitar tech and a marriage counselor. (:

SO, we still have a lot of work to do, but we're hoping the album will be released by the end of January. It's gonna be rock n' roll. Fo Sho!

It's also very cool because modern technology makes it so that we can fix minor mistakes without redoing entire sections of the rhythm. It's like, you don't even have to be good to make a good album (read, Taylor Swift, Miley Cyrus, The Jonas Brothers, etc). I'm not a music snob at all (NOT).

In fact, my father raised me to be a music snob. By the time I was three, he could ask me who we were listening to, and I could say so with fair accuracy: "The Beatles!" "Van (The Man) Morrison!" And boy was I proud to be able to do so. In fact, I still am. A love for music trivia is one of the things my dad instilled in me that I'm quite happy about. He has this awesome book (actually, it is so worn and beat up that I'd call it more of a stack of paper) called The Book of Rock Lists, which is kind of his Bible. Gimme Somma That Old Time Religion! He found a copy awhile back and gave it to me! My very own Holy Book. Also, inspired by my dad, I started collecting records in high school. There's not much that's better than listening to a good album on vinyl. Mmmmmm. Warm.

And soon I will have an album of my own... so. very. cool. I've been trying to convince my band that we should release it on vinyl, but they're not really going for it...

So, here are some of the photos I took in the studio (The Sound Studios, LLC). I didn't want to put any pics of people, since I haven't asked any of them if I could.

Happy Thanksgiving!

That's What it's All About!

Whew. It has been an insane week so far. I've been trying to continue writing this NaNoWriMo book, but, as you can see, I'm behind. I'm also officially unemployed now. Guess it's time to start drinking heavily and sitting around in my underwear. I had my last day of work yesterday. Wish me luck finding a job or two or three! And my band is in the recording studio this weekend, so that's pretty exciting! Lots of stuff. We've been having these insane marathon rehersals, so I'm tired. Very tired.

So, I promised I would let you know what my NaNoWriMo book is about, and, even though it is slightly embarrassing, I will make good on that promise. So, here goes:

My book is about a fifteen-year-old girl who has a mental health disorder. The disorder (which I sort of made up), is that she feels everything more intensely than everyone else. When she feels pain, it is crippling and overwhelming. When she feels joy or happiness, it is so intense that she can barely breathe. And it's terrifying because she knows the good feelings will eventually end. Her parents are divorced and she lives with her mother and sees her dad on Wednesdays and every-other weekend. Her mother owns her own business, which is an organizing business (I promise these exist... I know it's insane). So, by virtue of being a business owner, she purchased the health insurance plan that she and her one employee have. She didn't do her research and cheaped out on it. When the main character had her first nervous breakdown at school, the guidance counselor advised that she see a therapist weekly. So, because she was covered by a crappy plan, she had to go see the one therapist in town who took the plan. He left her condition undiagnosed and she steadily had a harder and harder time dealing with it all. So, the book follows a few days in the life of this poor teenager who can barely hold it together in every single moment.

The catalyst for change in the book comes when the insurance company the mother purchased a plan through goes under. So, she is forced to purchase a new plan, which means that Brennan has to change doctors. So, she does, gets diagnosed, and then gets put on meds. Eventually, she calms down, and deals with all the things that antidepressants bring to a person's life. I'm not sure exactly how it will end, but the question I want to leave hanging in the air will be whether or not taking mood-altering drugs was a good thing or a bad thing for her. Was it better to change herself that way? I guess I want it to be like, one way she feels too much, and the other way she feels very little. Which is better?

So, that's my story, which I am only half-finished telling. One thing's for sure... writing everyday is challenging and wonderful. When November is over, I can focus a little more on my blog, which I'm very excited about.

Alright, time to go to my fourth band practice this week.

One of My Role Models:

Seriously guys, this has probably come closer than anything else ever in the history of everything to making me pee my pants (and while I was in the office, too) from laughing so hard:

http://dooce.com/2009/05/26/36-weeks

I love this woman. If you like even a little of my writing, you'll love Heather Armstrong's Dooce.com. She's a genius.

She also wrote and edited a couple books, which I'll link to here:
















I read the book about postpartum depression, and it was good (mainly because it had a lot of her blog content in it). It's a quick read and I recommend it (which you'd know if you visited the Ryan's Recommendations section above! Not to make you feel guilty! Actually, expressly to make you feel guilty!Go! Click! Be Merry!).

Sorry for the short post, but man, November is insane! Next post, I will finally give you all an idea of my NaNoWriMo novel's plot (if you can even call it that). I know you can't wait.

DMV: The Game

Because I am close to 1/4 of a century old (yowsers!), I had to get my license renewed. And, because the great Commonwealth of Virginia has changed to a new system, you have to get the job done IN PERSON. So there could be no clickety-click, bing-bang-boom, wha-la, thank-yew internet. Meaning, brace yourself, it's time to stand in line at the local DMV building. With the annoying DMV people. And with the waiting. And the waiting some more.

The first game you play at the DMV is the "musical chairs" game. There are lots of unspoken rules, the most important of which is that you don't sit directly next to anyone unless you have to. You  must keep at least one chair in-between you and the complete stranger next to you. At least, that was my impression of the rules, until some dude decided he had to sit RIGHT next to me, even though there were plenty of other seats available. That made me quite uncomfortable.

The next game you play is Bingo. You are issued a ticket with a letter and a number, and this time mine was B100. There is an automated voice that calls out the number of who is next. She is the Bingo caller. For example, when I got there and got my ticket, the computer-lady-voice said "now serving B95 at window 11." And so I got excited; I was only five away from being helped. However, turns out there are more letters than just B. They called R181, E45, C92, etc. all before calling B96. And there I was with B100. I felt like I was waiting to win Bingo. And I also had a couple irrational fears. One being that they would skip my number, the other being that they would call me to a non-existant window. Irrational, maybe. But still, you sit and wait for SO LONG, and next to a guy who breathes really loudly, and behind a woman whose kid can't sit effin' still. Ugh.

And then a little ray of light shone down on me; they went from B97 to B100, skipping a few people (?). Bingo! So, I went up to window 11 and got my stuff taken care of. And then it was done, and that was that. I'd say I won that game.

And, cue the weekend... three, two, one, GO!

Happy weekend!

Ch-ch-ch Changes!

Why hello, it is nearly 2 AM, and I just pumped out a bunch of writing for my NaNoWriMo book attempt. And, I DON'T HAVE TO GO TO WORK TOMORROW. Let me repeat: I don't have to go to work tomorrow! Let the unemployment begin! I have a very exciting meeting tomorrow though, about a position I'm very interested in. Cross your fingers for me. More detail later.
I just wanted to point out that I made some changes to the webpage. The Ryan's Recommendations section is now a page of its own, and there is a tab above you can click on. Right now there are 20 items on it, all of which are things I enjoy, like, and recommend. Actually, on occasion there will be an item on there I want but don't have yet. Anyhow, check it out if you're interested. Also, I moved everything to the right side of the page to make more room for the actual blog posts. I thought things were starting to look cluttered the other way. It was a little distracting. So, any feedback would be greatly appreciated. There are a couple new things on the right side of the page now too, like a Pageview counter. I thought that was kind of cool.

It is really fun to play around with the site, but mainly I just want to figure out what works! If there's something you want to see (or that you don't want to see), let me know!

Ok, I tried to be a big girl and stay up late while Chris watches his nerdy Sci-Fi show, but now I'm ready for bed. Goodnight, lovlies.

Making a List...

So, today I'm going to save you the pain of hearing about "my book" again. Plus, I am missing writing regular  weird posts anyways. One thing on my mind is that the holiday season is almost upon us (wha?) again. I hadn't really thought much about it until my dad sent me an email yesterday asking for my Christmas list. Yes, I'm 24 and I still make Christmas lists. And believe in Santa Claus. He's the man. So Interwebbers, here is my list:

1. Canon Rebel XS
2. My 2 front teeth (Tho what? Thutup!)
3. Peace on Earth, and good will towards men (and WOMEN dammit.)
4. A boost pedal for my guitar setup
5. Another bunny (Shhhh, don't tell Chris!)
6. A job
7. An acoustic guitar amp
8. Cookies. Good ones, not ones with fruit or other disgusting crap on them.
9. Booze. Preferably red wine: Pinot Noir, Cab Sav, and Cab Franc are acceptable. NO SHIRAZ (EW) OR MERLOT.
10. Books and CDs pleeeeeeeeeeease. This one, this one, this one, oh, and this one and this one will do nicely.
11. This.
12. Having a relaxing, nice time with my loved ones and... yawn. Oh, excuse me. What was I saying?
13. Photoshop
14. A Web Design course
15. Summer weather and my extra hour of sunlight back
16. Winter clothes (unless #15 occurs): a sweater, some jeans, some courds, some boots, some socks. In other words, outfit me.
17. A workbench for my house (ahem, Chris...)
18. Dollars

Once you have decided what you will be getting me this year, please send an email to RyanwithUterus@gmail.com and I will then email you back the mailing address. Please don't send stupid crap; stick to the list. Also, another few things: 1- I will not be getting you anything in return, as I am soon-to-be-unemployed. 2- Although my birthday is also in December, that is not an excuse to get me one present for both Christmas and my birthday. That makes you lame. Get two presents. Wrap one in Christmas paper and one in birthday paper. Do not recycle your Christmas paper on my birthday present, mmmk? 3- Please communicate with each other; I don't want to get 29 bunnies, 29 jobs, or 29 copies of Ray LaMontagne's album Trouble. I'll leave that up to you. Also, it doesn't matter to me if you're not someone who celebrates Christmas. I don't discriminate; I'll take your gift anyways.

Another thing: Walmart is already playing Christmas music. Shoot. Me. Now. I'm not sure if I'll make it to December.

Excerpts

Holy crapnoid, it's been awhile, yes? For those of you just tuning in, I'm participating in National Novel Writing Month, which means I'm writing a 50,000-word book this month.

I've made it past the 1/5-of -the-way-done mark with the novel, which is pretty cool. Problem is, I'm still behind the recommended daily word count. I literally wrote 4,000 words yesterday though, so I'm feeling a bit burnt out. And my prose has steadily gotten worse as I've gone. But, good prose is not the point I guess. I've found that I love writing long, descriptive sections the most. Dialogue and people's thought processes are not my favorite.

Anyways, here are two more excerpts for your reading pleasure:

"The Victorian house on the tree-lined street seemed to lean ever-so-slightly to one side, like it was trying to peek around the large oaks in front of it. The paint on the outside was pastel purple and was peeling off, especially on the back side of the house, which got the most sun. The trim and accents were white, once. Now they were chipped and browning with age and neglect. The house could have looked like a gingerbread house once, but was now sagging and faded. Two large bushes flanked the walkway in front of the large, bowed porch and were never trimmed, much to the chagrin of the neighbors. The grass was scratchy and dry, but still managed to grow rampant. It cushioned the fall of the oaks' acorns in autumn, and it curled itself into the cracks in the walk, as if searching for a secret something. The address numbers that were nailed to the front of the house were tarnished brass, and the nail holding the 6 in "767" had loosened, causing it to flip over, disguising itself as a "9." The mailman, who had given his two weeks notice a few days earlier, felt sorry for his replacement's inevitable confusion. There was an old-fashioned mail slot in the door instead of a mailbox. This house, which should have been begging for some attention but wasn't, was Mr. Ryker, and Mr. Ryker was this house."

"The Monday morning sun started peaking through the blinds of Brennan’s room. She left them open slightly, so she would know what kind of day it was going to be as soon as she opened her eyes. If it was dark in the room when her alarm went off, she knew it was going to be rainy or grey or both. If it was light, she knew it was going to be sunny and bright. Brennan found that her mood was greatly affected by the weather, so she wanted to know as soon as she could what the day was going to bring. The idea of not even looking outside until she left for school seemed unreasonable. Why wait to know how the day was going to hit her?"

GOODNIGHT!

Falling Behind

Whelp, it's day 5 and I've fallen behind word count-wise. You may have noticed that my NaNoWriMo widget says the same number as it did yesterday. And that is because yesterday was our monthly 3-hour gig night at the local pub. So I did zero writing. But I feel ok about the fact that I didn't stay up past 1 AM again, which is when I was crawling into bed last night, mainly because I'm already tired enough. And it's FRIDAY so I have more time to write in the upcoming days (cuz it's the WEEKEND!). I have this wonderful picture in my head of how my Saturday is going to go:

I wake up late (I'm talking 11 or so), and get out of bed, refreshed and ready to start my day. I make my way downstairs, feed Coltrane, and start the coffee (aka Reason-For-Being Juice). I put a CD on, most likely Ray LaMontagne (currently obsessed with his new album!). While the coffee is brewing, I whip up some pancake batter and start the bacon. All the while I'm singing and "dancing" in the kitchen (dancing in quotes because I SUCK at it). Once the pancakes are going, I have my cup of coffee, and the bacon is done, I make a couple fried eggs and start singing louder, hoping to wake Chris up with the sound of my melodious squawking. I will most likely have to go upstairs and bug him to get up, but, when he does come downstairs, there will be two very lovely plates of yummy food waiting for us. We'll sit on the couch and eat, and I will fire up my netbook. When I have a belly full of breakfast, I will wrap a blanket around myself (cuz it's cold in our house), pour myself another cup of coffee, and write for hours. And hours. And perhaps take the occasional break to do things like pee and tell Chris to stop yelling at the TV screen (which he seems to have been doing a lot lately... whether it is at the World Series peeps or at the video game he's playing) because "I'm trying to write my damn book!" I may have to pull the "I made you breakfast, so you have to do what I say" card, which has absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact that I decided to make him breakfast in the first place, I swear.

PS- I just found this NaNoWriMo SONG! Awesome.

And, can I also just say, you all are lovely, and I hope you have weekends to match.

PPS (haha, PP)- Check out these books, one by the guy who started NaNoWriMo, and one by some other lady who claims to have the answer to my novel writing questions, and one bestseller that was actually orginally a NaNoWriMo novel:

Because I Promised

Whoa guys, this whole writing 1,667 words per day thing is hard! I'm actually really enjoying this though... it's nice to make myself write everyday. So, as promised, and because it's almost 1 AM and because I am too tired to write a whole blog post, here an excerpt from my National Novel Writing Month attempt. It's just the first paragraph, and I'm still hestitant to discuss my whole plot plan (plot plot?), because I'm working through it a little more, so you'll just have to take it as it is!

"Brennan counted the umbrellas around her in the chilly drizzle and came up with fourteen. She rolled that number around in her head, probed it, picked it up to look underneath it, and silently searched for its significance. Not that she believed in things like meaning or fate. At least not out loud. She had just turned fifteen, so perhaps there were fourteen umbrellas because the universe was reminding her that she was another year older, and that another year of life was gone away."

GOODNIGHT!

I'm 50!

Hey all you  non-crazy people, this is my 50th blog post! How insane is that? I'm counting on you to tell me how insane it is, because I am insane myself and therefore do not have the perspective needed to make a judgment call.

I am insane because I have decided to write a NOVEL this month. Which, by the way, is also the month where I'm trying to find a new job, the month where my band is recording its debut album, the month where I started going to therapy regularly, the month where I'm trying to get back into my exercise routine, and the month where Thanksgiving lives.

I hope I'm not the only one attempting this thing who has so much going on.

Last night I wrote my first 1,661 words. It was fun, challenging, and taught me a lot. For one, I'm so freakin' bad at dialogue. Two, this thing is driving itself in a way. Three, 1,667 words is kind of a lot. Four, I better start writing long, descriptive paragraphs so this thing will be long enough. I think I have in my head how a short story is written, because that is the only kind of fiction I have ever attempted. Five, trying to write in the living room with the World Series on= bad idea. Six, I will have no social life for the month of November.

This book has no name yet, but I have a plot idea, four main characters, and two minor characters. So that's something. I will divulge more when I'm feeling more comfortable than I am right now. Hopefully that will be soon! Tonight I have a ton going on. I have an hour planned for writing, but that's really it. It may end up being a late night.

Love to you all for your encouraging words yesterday!

Oh, and I voted today! You should too!

PS- I took my scrolling amazon widget down, and replaced it with my NaNoWriMo word count widget. Check it!

NaNoWriMo

No, that's not gibberish you see up there... that's the National Novel Writing Month abbreviation. This morning, my wonderful father sent me a link to the NaNoWriMo page, and I was instantly intrigued. I've always always wanted to write a book, and here's the excuse I need to give it a go. You "win" by successfully writing 50,000 words during the month of November. That's about 1,666.6666666666667 words per day, which is a lot. To the left of the blog posts, you will see my NaNoWriMo widget, which gives you an updated word count for my book (ha, that sounds weird). Actually, it isn't working right now because of incredible amounts of traffic at the NaNoWriMo site (how many times can I say that? Many...) Problem is, what the heck am I going to write about? I just heard about this today, so I have zero time for planning and (literally) plotting. It doesn't actually matter, because the whole point of this thing is to poop out those 50,000 words... there shall be no editing for the whole month. Then, after-the-fact, these insane "novelists" can decide if they want to pursue editing and/or publishing or if they want to abandon their work. I will probably end up with 50,000 words that have little to do with each other, but I guess we'll see!

So, today is November 1 (Happy Birthday Mom!), DAY ONE. My blog posts for this month will most likely revolve around this crazy undertaking, and may even contain excerpts. I may get little-to-no sleep, and I may have a complete nervous breakdown. I may not succeed. But hey, I bet I learn a helluva lot about myself and about my writing. 50,000 words is so very many words. I'm used to writing short blog posts, poems, songs, or short articles, so this is like my Marathon. With zero training.

Wish me luck, keep me posted if you're participating too, and check out what it's all about here: http://www.nanowrimo.org/.