The Church of the Modern-Day Songwriter

So, I'm not huge on things like, oh, religion. But I do worship songwriters... and, if you think it's blasphemous to worship something so "worldly," tell me, did Jesus ever have a hit? Don't dance around the question... the answer is NO people...

Here are some songwriters I worship:

Joni Mitchell: Numero Uno Worship-able Songwriter. The entire album Blue is like my Book of Genesis. It's where my obsession began. The lines are simple but poignant: "I wish a I had a river I could skate away on," "I wanna talk to you, I wanna shampoo you, I wanna renew you again and again," "But when he's gone, me and them lonesome blue collide; the bed's too big, the frying pan's too wide..." ah, it's all beautiful genius. And then there's the chord changes, about which I will not bore you. But just know they fit into the same Beautiful Genius category as the lyrics.

The Bealtes: I hate to lump all of the songwriters in this band together, but I didn't think you'd want to read a paragraph on each of them. So, here's the short version of what I think of each of the band members' songwriting styles: John= Raw, emotional. George= Elegant, true. Paul= Optimistic, fun. Ringo= Um? "Octopus's Garden," really? John's my favorite. So yeah, I guess because of their names, they'd be like the apostles right? Ringo being the 13th and forgotten one?

Bob Dylan: I realize liking Bob Dylan's songwriting is a huge cliche, but I don't really care. I enjoy the early, acoustic Dylan and the later, rocking Dylan. The sheer volume of great songs is just dizzying. I'm a fan of when songwriters and poets focus on the way words sound (not just what they mean), which is something Dylan most certainly did. And I don't think he's "Judas!" for going electric! (For those of you who don't get the reference: In 1966 in Manchester, England, Dylan came out for the second half of his concert there with an electric band (The Band!), and a person in the crowd yelled "Judas!" at Dylan, meaning that he was a traitor for going electric. Dylan replied, "You're a liar," and then proceeded to instruct his band to "play it fucking loud!" which is freakin' awesome.)

Van Morrison: Van will always be "Van the Man" to me. Like Dylan, the sheer volume of fantastic songs to come out of this one person is just amazing. "Tupelo Honey," "Into the Mystic," "Queen of the Slipstream," "Caravan," "Moondance," "Someone Like You," "Have I Told You Lately," I mean seriously, how can one person write so many epically wonderful songs? And he was so anal about instrumentation, but, in my opinion, that's a big part of what make his songs great. And I think, if there was a god, his voice would probably sound a lot like Van's.

Robbie Robertson: The main songwriter of the band The Band. I think a few of the other members (Levon Helm especially) also did some of their songwriting, but Robbie wrote or cowrote most of their songs. Robbie (ok, we're not really on a first-name basis, but we should be) is one of those Non-Singer/Songwriters. He's not much for the singing thing, but can play the Hell out of the guitar and write the Hell out of a song. I'd say he is reponsible for getting a lot of the Hell out of a lot of things.

Ray LaMontagne: Much more recently in the spotlight, this guy is freakin' amazing. There are hints of Van Morrison and Joni Mitchell throughout his songwriting and recording, but he's also got his own thing going on. He writes songs that have a lot of soul, and many of them move me to tears. His new album is my favorite, and it's called God Willin' and the Creek Don't Rise. His voice is incredibly sexy also; I think this guy could sing a woman pregnant... Immaculate Conception.. Ha, anyone? Anyone at all...? Nobody?

Josh Ritter: Chris and I saw him with his full band live the other night, and he is simply incredible. His songs may be the most intelligent I've ever heard. Plus, the man knows how to put on a show. He had the entire nearly sold-out crowd slow-dancing together during one of his songs; it was great! He is another songwriter that evokes complex emotions in his writing; somehow I can feel hopeful and sad all at once when I listen to him. He is able to allude to literature, folklore, and pop culture all in the same song. It's amazing. He is also always smiling on stage. Chris and I both really like his songwriting, but Chris considers him, well, how do I say this? Maybe a little too gentle? (not in a bad way, just compared to his favorites like Tom Waits and Steve Earle), so we'll say that Josh Ritter is the Angel of Songwriting. Plus lots of his songs have religious imagery ("If evil exists, it's a pair of train tracks and the devil is a railroad car...").

Obviously there are nearly countless numbers of incredible songwriters, and I happen to personally know quite a few. But the ones I worship are the giants, the ones who are on a whole other level, the ones who rub elbows with perfection on a daily basis, the ones who don't quite seem earthly...

Peace be with you, and AMEN!