Co-ed Sports

I started this blog by writing some things about gender, my name, and how the environment you grow up in greatly influences who you become as an adult. I also wrote about how I have a bit of a complex when it comes to losing to boys.

That said, I joined a co-ed soccer team this spring, and some of those gender-type issues have surfaced for me as a result. I played on all-girls' teams from ages 10-18. So, I've found that there are some things I like about playing co-ed sports, and some things I can't stand. And, somehow, the cons have greatly out-weighed the pros for me.

Co-ed Pros:
1. The idea of equality! Someone, somewhere, decided that girls and guys are on the same level. I want to kiss that person.
2. Boys= yummy.
3. I've always had an easier time making friends with guys, and generally feel more comfortable around them. I couldn't tell you why.
4. Beating boys= amazing feeling!
5. Some teams seem to be able to have an amazing harmony and team-chemistry between male and female players. It's great to see.

Co-ed Cons:
1. Boys, on occasion, seem to not want to pass to girls. I'm not sure if this is something that is a concious choice or a subconcsious thing, but either way it sucks. Sucks sucks sucks. I especially hate it because I'm at least a semi-decent soccer player; it's not like I don't even know the rules or something. So these boys will dribble and dribble and show off and end up losing the ball. If they had done the simple thing and passed it to any of the open players (ME!) the ball would have remained in posession. I AM NOT IMPRESSED THAT YOU LOST THE BALL. PERIOD. ARGH! Seriously guys- girls don't sleep with ball-losing losers. Hopefully that solves that.
2. Guys and girls plays sports differently, I assume because different types of bodies are built for different things.  Because I played on girls' teams for so long, I know how to play the game the way females tend to: Lots of passing, give-and-go's, using your butt, etc. Throwing guys (who tend to play a running game featuring long kicks) and girls together makes it difficult to figure out what kind of strategy to use!
3. It's always some guy who appoints himself team-leader and starts ordering people around. Ryan no likey!
4. I have always had trouble making girl-friends, and, growing up, it was always my soccer team that provided me with the opportunity to find at least a few wonderful girls I enjoyed hanging out with. I think my life is a lot less rich for the lack of a Soccer Girls posse.
5. Some girls seem to be a little self-concious around boys, and, even though I'd like to say that I'm not, there's a chance that I am a little, at least on some level.
6. When boys beat me, I want to murder them.
7. There's a rule that you have to have at least 3 girls on the field. The reason such a rule exists is that there are always more boys than girls who sign up to play co-ed. This bothers me! We're always outnumbered!
8. I have yet to have a female referee. There seems to be a very real boys-are-in-charge feeling in the league.
9. Whether I like it or not, boys are often bigger, and they have hurt me quite a bit this season. I got elbowed in the face this past weekend, got taken out to the tune of a bloody skinned knee last weekend, and I am pretty much covered in nasty bruises. At least I get bragging rights.

So, perhaps this means I should play in the womens' league next season. I dunno. What I do know is how much I've been thinking about my old travel team from high school. I miss it. I miss the people, the chemistry, my old friends, the coaches, everything. Mainly I miss how sure of myself I was back then. No matter what bullshit (and man, was there some bullshit) was going on in other parts of my life, I always had confidence that I was a good soccer player, that I had people around me who liked and respected me, that I looked good, and that I was going places.

And here I am.

Today I....

Played soccer! For the first time in YEARS. I joined a new local women's league and went to a pickup game today. I think real games start next week. Anyways, it was so much fun! And, holy crap, it was a lot of running. My workout DVDs are great, but they are a mix of strength and cardio and are quite short. Running for 90 minutes is not something I've tried to do in like 6 years. I now also have a HUGE blood blister on my big toe. Yummy. I didn't think about the fact that the huge calluses I used to have on feet are long gone. I also didn't realize how much I really missed playing.

When I was in high school, soccer was my life. In fact, when I was a freshman, I wanted to play college ball and eventually play professionally (though, at the time, the only way to do that was to make the national team). I worked really hard and happened to luck out with some amazing teammates and coaches. In fact, the travel team I played on later in my high school career was one of the best things in my life at the time. Things on that team just clicked. We all had an amazing chemistry on the field and off the field. It's hard to describe to someone who has never played before. I was not the fastest, or the best at any one thing, but I think I had an intuition thing going on. I was a smart player, and I was decent at distributing the ball. We had some great times, traveled to a few places for tournaments, went whitewater rafting, and just really enjoyed each other's company. Ah, I'm getting misty-eyed (I do that a lot)!

High school soccer was fun for a little bit, but there was a lot of pressure and my love for the game was slowly replaced with stress and frustration. Plus, I had a nasty ankle injury sophomore year. I was completely ignored at that point, because I was, for all intents and purposes, useless. That was a pretty hard thing to deal with.

Also, as I started getting on towards the end of high school, I started getting interested in things besides soccer. I realized that there were so many things I didn't get to do because I was spending every second doing sports. I started getting into music, and eventually started playing guitar. I also wanted to spend some more time building a social life. I was working a part-time job and getting really into the academic part of school. I wanted to have time to join the History Club, etc.

But, after all this time, I do really miss playing soccer. It was such a huge part of my life and is a big part of who I am now. I miss being on a team. I miss having a 12-18 girlfriends without even having to think about it. I miss having that outlet for stress. Today, I even realized I miss the small ritual of sitting in the grass and putting shinguards, socks, and shoes on; it was always a time of contemplation for me. It's great that my town has started a women's league, and I'm happy I'll get to play a few games.

Sigh. I'm gonna be sore tomorrow!

RYAN'S RECOMMENDATIONS:

Listening: I've been listening to the CD my dad made me for high school graduation. One of the songs on it is "Wouldn't it Be Nice" by the Beach Boys. I was obsessed with the Beach Boys when I was young. I remember listening to them on cassettes with my Walkman.

Reading: Chesapeake

Watching: Bones, Season 2. Some crazy forensics shit. And, perhaps a budding romance.

Working Out: Played soccer today (as I may have mentioned before...). Sports are so wonderful. You get a workout while you're having fun and not even paying attention to the fact that you're exercising. Yeah.